OBRelationships: Nudes & Exes! The Problems With Sending & Keeping


Sending nudes might be a thing right now, but it’s not necessarily something most of us are comfortable with. And besides, just because he asks doesn’t mean you need to oblige. Not because everyone is doing it, your friends, social media peers and all, doesn’t mean you should follow suit.

When someone you’re dating sends you a X-Rated selfie, there’s context: Presumably, at time of receipt you shared emotional or at least sexual intimacy with the sender, and when you no longer share that intimacy, you don’t get that privilege anymore.

If you’re no longer romantically entangled with a person, the consent—the permission to peep, expires. The only obvious reason to keep an ex’s nudes is masturbation, or blackmail and that crosses a number of boundaries. Masturbating to someone’s picture is creepy when things ended badly, and it’s even creepier if you stayed friends. Especially when the Internet is full of pictures of naked people who never had a toothbrush at your apartment.

So people, here are some of the problems associated with sending nudes:


  1. Everyone will blame you

If you see a picture of a naked person online, the default assumption is that they put it there themselves, because we want to believe that the world is a beautiful place full of consensual genitalia. Of course, it’s a bummer if your boss or your spouse or parents finds those pictures, because most people frown on that sort of thing.


2. You’ll Mostly Hear: “You Shouldn’t Have Sent the Pictures in the First Place!”

Some people argue that this whole issue comes down to women not being careful enough online. Have you ever heard about revenge porn? No one is ever prepared for the revenge porn experience. You can’t take precautions against something you don’t know exists.


3. It’s More Than Sharing Photos.

Maybe you’re thinking that this whole thing is getting blown out of proportion. Sure, it’s a massive violation, but the Internet is nothing if not massive and violating. What are the odds of someone you know actually recognizing you, let alone bringing enough attention to affect your life?


4. Chances Are You Will Break Up.

Not to be harsh or anything, but almost half of all marriages end in divorce, and you aren’t even married yet. Do you really want your ex having cart blanche over your nudes?


So people, let’s be careful out there, Be careful about what you send out, because this world is also an evil place and some people are eager to see people’s downfall.



Sources –Cracked.com, GQ



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